Fears Setting In

29 Weeks....

Went to the doctor a few days ago.  We had to re-run a few tests from my hospital stay earlier in the month.  The results weren't what we'd hoped for.

When I was discharged from the hospital, cervical length was 2.2 cm.  This time it was 1.6 cm.  At this rate, they suspect I'll deliver by 34 weeks at the latest.  The fetal fibronectin, was positive again: 40% chance of delivering in 2 weeks.  Doctor doesn't believe I will, based on cervical length, and I trust her more than a test.

Baby is a good size, about 3 Lbs right now.  We couldn't get a good length on him/her, because of the breech positioning.  Poor kid's foot was above it's face!  :(

But she wants me resting as much as possible.  And I want to be resting.  It's hard to sit up in a chair at times; I kinda wish I had a couch or something at my office to lay down on and work.  On the days I work from home, I'm usually on the couch with my laptop.  It's easier to get work done with you're comfortable.  But I'm really not comfortable.  The baby is trying really hard to move, but doesn't seem to be able to.  It's so painful for me, I don't have any clue what he/she must be feeling in there.

I got another "fat"/"Are you sure there's just 1" comment this week... The kid is laying sideways right under my diaphragm... if baby was sitting normally I wouldn't look this big.

Goodness, I've only gained 12 lbs this entire pregnancy, and most of it in the last 2 weeks!  I think the steroid shot has really helped baby grow, and so my appetite is finally growing too.  Still have plenty of food aversions, though...

The kids have been getting a kick out of watching my belly move, and Steve seems to be enjoying talking to my belly, because every time he does, the baby gets excited and starts kicking/squirming.

I feel better knowing we're doing everything in our powers to keep baby healthy - lots of prayer, rest, even reaching out to others for help.  But I can't deny the fact that I'm so scared.  I know that sometimes even full term 40 week babies have health issues and end up in the NICU, but going into all this knowing I'll probably have a few weeks there... As amazing as my hospital is, the NICU is a sad place.

Don't Pray For Me...

...Pray for us.

There is nothing more discouraging than seeing the reaction on someone's face when they've asked "So you're all better now, right?" and I respond "Not really" or "everyday is different."

I mean, I know everyone wants me to be better. So do I.  Don't you think I pray for healing, too?  But I've come to accept this condition, and the plans that God may have for me and the baby.

I appreciate the prayers for healing, but what I really ask of my prayer warrior friends, is to pray for us.

Hyperemesis patients have a history of late term miscarriages and preterm delivery.  With all 3 of my kids being born 2, 3 and 5 weeks early, the chances of another pre-term delivery were pretty high.  But I'm doing everything medically possible to prevent this, and of course we are in constant prayer.

So while I welcome and encourage the prayers of others for my healing from HG, I really encourage and ask that you pray for us:

Pray that the baby gets the nutrients that he/she needs to grow, and that I get the nutrients and fluids to provide for the baby.  

Pray for the Grace and understanding, and especially patience for those around me; particularly my kids who aren't getting as much Mommy time as I know they'd like.

Pray for my husband, the provider and caregiver for our family, that he feels peace through this stressful time. 

Pray for my doctors and nurses, as they continue helping me through this pregnancy.

Pray for people who want to step up and help, to not be afraid to help.

How to Behave Around A Pregnant Woman Part 1

"Common Sense Isn't Common Anymore" is a phrase that I hear and use almost daily.  What use to make perfect sense to everyone to do or not do is not the case anymore.  People now need baby-step by baby-step instructions for everyday interactions.

Especially around pregnant women.

Now, this is just my opinion, with input from some friends, but I think most pregnant women would agree.  Here is the start of my list


Having a baby bump does NOT give you permission to rub my belly.  I mean I could go on and on, make this whole post about it but here are a few of the big reasons

1. Personal Space.  I get it, some people are just touchy-feely and will find any excuse to hug your or whatever.  But you wouldn't want me rubbing your non-baby belly, so why should you rub my belly.  
2. Maternal instincts.  We are growing a little human in our wombs.  That is my child.  Don't touch my child.
3. Sensitive Skin.  Did you know that some women actually experience sunburn like symptoms on their bellies due to the stretching.  Yea, it hurts. Don't touch.

Don't Call A Pregnant Woman "huge".  We're women.  We can be vain.  We are suppose to gain about 30lbs in a pregnancy.  We develop swelling in random places, carry water weight and have a hard time maneuvering with our protruding bellies.  We already feel huge, you don't need to point it out. And husbands, calling your wife fatty or even "phatty" is NEVER acceptable.

Don't Ask "Is this your first?"  Such an uncomfortable question for so many women.  There are those who have had many miscarriages, or lost a child, that the question is just hard to answer, and it is hard for the other person to hear the answer.

Then there are those who have multiple children, and people give really weird looks when you say "It's my 4th," like you're some kind of side show freak.  I hate when someone responds with "Ever hear of birth control," or even more inappropriate "Ever think of saying no."

Children are miracles from God, a blessing to their families.  Whether in our arms or in our hearts, every baby is precious.

Are you still sick?  Have you tried ____?" If you have HG like me, the answer is always yes.  And sometimes that's hard for people to understand.  And then they list off things that they tried to deal with their morning sickness.  When you've been dealing with it for 20+ weeks, don't you think a women would spend hours online looking up home remedies and old wives tales and try them all, just to feel better?  You really think telling me to drink Ginger Ale at 22 weeks is going to make me say "Oh gee, why didn't I think of that?"

Don't offer to help if you're not going to help.  If you offer to make a pregnant women or new mom a few meals, or to come help with chores, or to watch the kids so she can sleep, and she accepts - DO IT.  If you're not going to follow through, DON'T OFFER.  And, if she doesn't accept - DO IT ANYWAY.  Call and say "I made an extra dish of lasagna for dinner, can I bring it over to you?"  As a mom of 3 with Hyperemesis, and a husband who works 50+ hours a week, making dinner and household chores are hard to get done.

Veggie Lasagna... takes 5 minutes to put together.
Make one for someone!

So that is the start of my list, there is plenty more where that came from...